treessmileandsway

2009-01-04T20:46:00.000-08:00

yo ho ho it's been awhile since i last written anything. cept for the occasional jotting down of telephone numbers for my mom's reference. my uncle got into this car accident in macau and my sister and i had to do this and that, help sort out information for my mom.

what....... have i to say.
i'll be off in a few minutes job hunting. hopefully i cinch a job.
oh boring bits.
but first i need to look presentable.
then i'll be walking a few hundred metres off the job hunting area (which is actually a 10 mins walk from my place. hee lazy me.) to buy a potted plant. i think it's going to add some tranquility to my room. that sounded strange didn't it.
and. hopefully develop some of the photos of the trip to china if i have enough time.
if all goes well i'll be home in time to change and leave, location yet unconfirmed, for an early dinner.

my heart fears for something unknown, unknown in every sense of the word.

frisée and apple salad with dried cherries and walnuts

2008-09-04T00:46:00.000-07:00

the week had me in touch with my inner lazy bones - bones. in fact i did not like it one bit at all. it spells intertia at all joints ( extended metaphor i see) look closely enough you manage to see cobwebs hanging from it. what started off as inspiring slowly degradated into this perpetual cohabiting with hello comfort. yes its comfort. and its annoying me every second. even as i type this.

but. the good that ooze out of the snuggle ups to comfort:
my love life with greek yoghurt. awfully sour but tastes amazing when stirred with honey. your china brand songshan honey but works the same nevertheless.
attempted to learn the guitar whilst the rest of the cell was bbqing what have yous: so far. ive can pluck a tiny tune and strum a humble chord. which spells 1/8th of a potential song. good for you.
rummaged the fridge for anything edible - found a packact (?) of instant udon. a dash of this and that.. voila udon with miso base. what a dampener (?) , that my sister opted for the food downstairs rather support her domestically deprived sister. not that it affected me though, i savoured every drop of miso. so..

plans for later:
skip the tv dinner ( my mom and sis are GOING OUT - no dinner tonight) and attempt spinach and apple salad!! (supposedly "frisée and apple salad with dried cherries and walnuts" up on epicurious.com but i'll tweak it with whateverv i can find in the fridge hahah) sounds crass i know but dont be fooled by appearances! the fridge is my soon to be ..soulmate. ok horrible concocted metaphor ill be good the next time round. and uh please pray hard for good ol lazy bones to get a hard crack about the joints.

2008-08-03T06:29:00.001-07:00

i am glad to have been through , not least, 1/125th of a second with you. It was not possession, but something that was willingly shared.

2008-07-31T04:10:00.000-07:00

today was a terribly shitty day. its unlike the usual whiny kind of days.. rather hard to pinpoint. since i dont know it any better. strangely, nothing pretty much happened. it's probably just my mood . or the weather. or the crap load pile of stuff strewn about my head thats screaming major migraine levels. or how i needed sleep. nothing much happened.

nothing much happened.
that's probably why. im . feeling. so shitty. comfort doesnt ease my guilt.
that's probably why. because i don't pretty much know what's happening and im stuck in this rut devoid of light. its terribly morose. yes. thats it.

2008-07-13T09:35:00.000-07:00

wow the rainbow connection is such a simple yet amazing song. it always brings tears to my eyes (figure of speech).

What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
What do we think we might see?

2008-07-13T08:49:00.000-07:00

HELLO PEOPLE
is my font friendly enough for old folks to view?
hm .. i wonder.

2008-06-13T02:34:00.000-07:00

this is so interesting it deserves a mention in the humble blog.

did you know that jodie, lois, wanyin, and i were in the same kindergarden!! for a brief period of time though. but its so cool! ahhahahah alrighto.

to commemorate our 14 years of knowing each other!

2008-05-26T08:56:00.000-07:00

I don't want to go on being a root in the dark,
insecure, stretched out, shivering with sleep,
going on down, into the moist guts of the earth,
taking in and thinking, eating every day.

I don't want so much misery.
I don't want to go on as a root and a tomb,
alone under the ground, a warehouse with corpses,
half frozen, dying of grief.

That's why Monday, when it sees me coming
with my convict face, blazes up like gasoline,
and it howls on its way like a wounded wheel,
and leaves tracks full of warm blood leading toward the
night.

and this, is what changes the face of the day.
(i'm glad for it too wanyin)

so the holidays have just begun. the first day was alright, in fact i felt totally unrestrained. it was just a mad rush of completing homework and toggling between doing jiayi's present and curbing the URGE TO EAT yelp went without food for a whole 4 hours totally unbearable. going to school at WHATEVER TIME YOU LIKE (ok it spells irresponsibiltiy so?)

i love the idea of owning a single storey house. went on some cheap thrill with wanyin and her dad - driving past those mega huge but not high and mighty (literally) houses - built during the pre-independence days - and just fantasizing about being able to lie down on the lawn and gaze up at the night sky. just you and silence watching the sky there's nothign to obstruct your view. its a little slice of heaven its simply amazing. it rolls for miles and miles, unfolding stars at every juncture.

ok i better slap myself back into reality. its a painful fall from up in the clouds. ouych.

2008-05-09T10:56:00.000-07:00

just came back after a terribly heavy 'supper' and went for the sa guitar concert reverie before that. i went in with no expectations of getting money back guarantee but boy was i proved wrong. its pretty good, despite everything bad i had it associated with. hahahah im sorry impressions do not do justice at times and the concert was pretty good. they had songs like 'falling slowly' it was really good they did a great cover of that song! its so stuck in my head it puts me in a dreamy mood.. not bad for 5 bucks huh!

this week had been terribly busy with so many tests and concerts to rush to but i see my friends around me bravely facing what theyve got in front of them that it gives me strength to carry on (knowing that ive got this i dont wanna do it anymore attitude) so yay for all of us! another week to pull through gosh i sound as though its a torture. well it is and no one's complaining!

its 2 am and im feeling this whole swirl of stuff.. im excited over nothing, im afraid of the unknown. ts this quiet trepidation and its like this tiny humbug leaping inside me, wanting to leap higher each time but not knowing what its headed for.

well thats it for updates ive got a whole pile of chemistry molecules to sift through and shun's piano thing and cell tomorrow! even food doesnt taste as good as before. :(

2008-05-05T04:05:00.000-07:00

They had not gone far before they saw the Mock Turtle in the distance, sitting sad and lonely on a little ledge of rock, and, as they came nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as if his heart would break. She pitied him deeply. 'What is his sorrow?' She asked the Gryphon. And the Gryphon answered, very nearly in the same words as before, 'It's all his fancy, that: he hasn't got no sorrow, you know. Come on!'

So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who looked at them with large eyes full of tears, but said nothing.

'This here young lady,' said the Gryphon, 'she wants for to know your history, she do.' So they sat down, and nobody spoke for some minutes. Alice thought to herself 'I don't see how he can ever finish, if he doesn't begin.' But she waited patiently.

'Once,' said the Mock Turtle at last, with a deep sigh, 'I was a real Turtle.'

These words were followed by a very long silence, broken only by an occasional exclamation of 'Hjckrrh!' from the Gryphon, and the constant heavy sobbiing of the Mock Turtle. Alice was very nearly getting up and saying, 'Thank you sir, for your interesting story,' but she could not help thinking there must be more to come, so she sat still and said nothing.

Well that's exactly how I feel these days, like the Mock Turtle.

2008-04-26T07:49:00.000-07:00

life is a big fat shapeless blob thats trying to kill me
i feel like im trapped in blubblubublufs blubber.
everyone's always reaching for perfection i dont get why

2008-04-24T06:32:00.000-07:00

yay the photos are finally up!
a week ago we went back to sc for the carnival!
let's see..
oh crap oh crap im not supposed to be playing around with photobucket im should be studying!

hehheeh but still the photos are hilarious :D

hahah i can safely say that i look the best (or least mutated) here guess who they are! hahah we look like we just got beaten up badly
thank goodness they dont fancy reading blogs so.. i'm safe :)

the real deal: michelle, lois, wanyin, and jodie! (who only appears in this photo)

a bout of goofing around: let's just say i was tired hm.

camwhoring! (since its obsessive, there's sure to be more further down.)

lois showing off a good buy " i got all these curry puffs a $8 only!!"

another product placement courtesy of lois: coffee bean's vanilla dream (?), another goner at $6. no really, im not obsessing over the prices!

lois unaware that she was being photographed.

lois still thinking she's not in the photo despite attempts to remove herself

hahah wanyin and qian posing with lois's intensed looks

wanyin again. wow speaking of which she has really changed alot! hahahahh

they must have been listening/watching dbsk again!!

what the!

hahaha janine is in the background! they're posing with this balloon octopus - the resemblace to jess's toy octopus georgie is uncanny - we picked georgie up from some random bush!

hahah exchange of glares and attempting to look like georgie.

bye bye georgie! we dumped him at the bush next to the random bush.

what better place to end off than at the peranakan garden?

ok that was that its over phew i hate resizing photos. i am craving for good oleeee meepok now now!!

2008-04-22T07:40:00.000-07:00

ok i refuse to update without photos to boot
because im too lazy to wait for the photos to upload and please bear with me. :)

-

omg this sounds so late but what wanyin said is so true!!
nothing can ever change the fact that the past is gone now and forever!
shit those good ol days are gone

2008-04-17T08:43:00.000-07:00

school is so hectic its frantic its urging me to escape even more
like, slacken more so than usual.

Oh anyway as i was late for school today it was raining heavily everything seemed like tv static to me. i had to wade through unexpected pools of water and my absorbent shoes really helped alot. i thought i was quick enough to miss being the target of many possible splashes made by traffic but hell no the uneven ground caused me much ...misery. pleasure. i choose misery. I saw the local definition of a man made waterfall right aside the longkang today. it was. morphine for my anguished body hahahah. alright im feeling insecure and tired of writing so................................ that's it for now.

2008-04-16T16:46:00.000-07:00

hi ho i promised to update didn't i?
let it start on a day, where i am busy churning out an essay, late for school, still pushing myself to complete what i've started out with.
hm. any suggestions on what i should blog about?!

2008-03-18T06:36:00.000-07:00

Stain Boy

Of all the super heroes,
the strangest one by far,
doesn't have a special power,
or drive a fancy car.

next to Superman and batman, I guess he must seem tame.
But to me he is quite special,
and Stain Boy is his name.

He can't fly around tall buildings,
or outrun a speeding train,
the only talent he seems to have
is to leave a nasty stain.

Sometimes I know it bothers him,
that he can't run or swim or fly,
and because of this one ability,
his dry cleaning bill is sky-high.

2008-03-15T03:47:00.000-07:00

its like talking. not like self reflecting kind of work, but virtually no one- vacuum like . the responses you get arent even decent. you go hello? and you dont get an echo or something natural or expected. updating and keeping your life in check with someone else seems like a pleasant-er solution. the advertistment and flashing images are killing my eyes!! the trashy impression im getting, i better get some money from it ;) and well.. here's something i took in taiwan.

my sister and her shadow on a lets tread on paths cautiously thing. its like doing some jig in the sunlight?

2008-03-13T00:20:00.000-07:00

dont you just love the design :) its just so annoying
exciting young silly spirited random loud sarcastic stubborn individual optimistic dramatic dancer bubbly clumsy bratty energetic hyper anxious colourful determined flirty outgoing fun CONFIDENT FRIENDLY
exciting young silly spirited random loud sarcastic stubborn individual optimistic dramatic dancer bubbly clumsy bratty energetic hyper anxious colourful determined flirty outgoing fun CONFIDENT FRIENDLY
hhahah YES i spent a great deal staring at the screen trying to capture what that whole flash was about.
sorry about the annoying music. i cant do much about it.
hello jwong! are you happy to see this?
ill try my best to update as and when (even if i dont feel like updating ummmm)

updates updates
ve been at home trying to study but no i know its been fruitless unfructified (yeap)
till i find more interesting stuff to type
oh watch 'ghost world' its a pretty unteen like teen movie. scarlett johannsohn (?!) is actually 15 years old when she was in this movie! seymours a freak but he has great taste in music.
alright hullabaloos

2008-01-30T23:17:00.000-08:00

i still have no inkling about everything that's going on around me
but well tests are over everything's just getting started ah i dont know goodbye

2008-01-23T07:10:00.000-08:00

what am i doing

2007-12-30T07:55:00.000-08:00

heheheheheh hello friends im back from taiwan!

if thailand is the land of smiles
taiwan should be the land of lies - tourist traps and bogus beggars
of course its not that extreme and its not as harsh as it sounds.
the people (exclude taipei) work so hard only to earn a miserly amount of around a thousand sgd per month and some of these people are street hawkers who depend on tourists for business.

with them, NIGHT MARKETS wouldnt exist! to quote our tour guide benny, ' if hong kong is the food paradise (referring to restaurants), taiwan is the haven for street snacks.' snacks it is. we ate so much my sister couldnt take it and puke a record of 4 times. that states our day to day going ons and boy it was great. details next time.

john lennon's oh my love is such a beautiful classic.

2007-12-08T06:03:00.000-08:00

Its been less than a week since I came back from Karimun and my friends have added the human touch to this trip!

2007-12-04T13:00:00.000-08:00

Wow haven't been here in quite awhile and stuff happened.
well i just came back from the controvery laden karimun island and ive reaffirmed stuff, about myself, about others around me.
Not exactly significant nor life changing, but heartwarming it was. Pictures up soon.

2007-10-31T21:59:00.000-07:00

i need cash cows i dream flying soaring wads of cash
clipped wings
money spirals mimics my crushing desires faced with reality

too much its too much i need food
cravings of indonesian cuisine
thick juicy bits of beef in my rendang
simple grilled indonesian food
and my kueh ambon
its been a long while
friends come forth
its time to celebrate!

reality check: i need money and friends to fulfill such wants.
hallelujah!
hallelujah!
halle------lujah!

i think im a dreamer. I dream of baking this and that and savouring the sweet victory of conquering a mere rice pudding or (insert ANY delicacy) but i never never ever get down to doing it. Sometimes i really detest myself for having my own way. next up on the list: finally getting down to doing pw

my intended schedule for today which i will abide by:
1pm: eat lunch.
2pm: start doing pw pw pw pw pw pw pw pw
5pm: RICE PUDDING :cD
6pm: uh. more work.
7pm: dinner
8pm: movies :cD ehehehheehehheheheheheheh

2007-10-24T10:31:00.001-07:00

Delightful delightful delightful

After getting frustrated with pw, I dragged jasmine (wan) to prata house to munch on pratas.
We Dig Pratas!
Had a DELIGHTFUL time there. and NUS has great buildings i wanna have a photoshoot!

Walked her to her rtc bus stop which is so bloody far and sent her off. Here comes the best part. When i was crossing the bridge to my bus stop, there was a blind lady trying to feel her way down the steps and out of the blue i offered my assistance................................

You get the gist. Basically I helped her and as a result i met lois whilst helping the lady look out for her bus! hehehehehhehehehe what a pleasant surprise lois im really glad i met you OKAYAMA and we yakked and yakked and yakked and i decided to recount all the gross shit that happened in school and vice versa. Oh how i wish this day would never end............................ Okay so we parted and i boarded the nokia bus (!) home and just nice, jess smsed me to inform me that her shift was ending so if i wanted to catch her in action (at work pouring juice shots hehe) i had to rush there but nooooooooo my ezlink card had a pathetic sum of 28 cents left so i had to stop at jelita and top up my ezlink card but noooooooooooooo i forgot to bring my wallet to school luckily i had my atm card so yes i could top up my card and catch a bus to holland v and yay i managed to catch jess and she treated me to 2 shots, one carrot and lemongrass and the other pumpkin, chilli and carrot which totally kicksass but i have no idea why my sis and mom didnt like it when i bought back a cup of carrot juice )c:

They dont know how to appreciate the finer points in life!
But well i learnt that things fall nicely into place just when youre feeling out of sorts and not know what to do, and youre so not in control of your life. You say God has his plans and yesiree I do agree. That was the best day in awhile. The sky was an AZURE BLUE. (cheesy essay phrase) and fluffy clouds were strolling past, shapeshifting every minute every second it was relaxing having to walk past and experience these lovely sights.

Ahhh....

2007-10-21T09:05:00.000-07:00

Pablo Neruda

Sonnet XVII (17)

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where there is no I or you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

-

So profound and vast that I cannot comprehend, it seems to be beyond my scope of knowledge. Of course im sure I'll get it some day :) I do know such love exists. Studied this poem back in sc and i can totally bet that i must have fallen asleep during lit when ms soh was annotating this poem.

Hahha i seem like such a freak nowadays with my slanted specs and resulting insecurity and suffering from insomnia and taking wrong buses and feeling all topsy turvy and reading wanyin's blog till god knows when. Strange phase.

and strangely, i seem to relish in it. I want to lay back and live in my own world and dream beyond dreaming. I detest rowdy crowds and i do not back attempts to turn jcs into what is hip and cool and . settling into my quiet shell is enough. Do you know what i'm talkin yo?

What i really want is to try something new. Have the courage to try something new, because i miss that thrill and feeling of learning something new. contradicts Kinda Think so? You

2007-10-14T08:51:00.000-07:00

The 100th post!

Updates:
Exams over
3/4 of the results out
On the verge of getting retained
Rather stressed out
PW
Breakdown in communication with mommy
and Daddy
Hoping the class would not have to split
Emotional stress
Coping with sombre atmospheres in school
Emotional pile up
Plently of classmates crying day after day
Making sense of stuff

I've lost myself once and I'm fully aware of the situation.
It's not as bad as I make it out to be.
And of course,

2 days of retreat did give me the time to plot my next move
and to gather the strength to carry it out.
So far, it's been swell.
And the crutches of support had been the faith I've had in God.
Slowly, but steady.

2007-10-02T19:32:00.000-07:00

Jessica:

Hello I thought it would be best and sweet if you were to stumble onto my blog post one day and read this entry. I mean why blog? I chose not to tell you because i feel comfortable leaving it out here, waiting for you to pick this up. It's like the modern twist of those message in the bottle kind of thing, just that this time im pretty sure of who im writing to. It's hard to get into the whole serious talk mood straight away when im face to face with you, so letting my immediate responses out here.. its just right.

I read your entries and i thought that it could help if i affirmed your thoughts, since i really cant fully undertand what you're going through right now. You know, it's the whole different people undergo different experiences thing that shape our thoughts and depth of our emotions. Ok you know what I mean. But i feel that you're unique in every way you are. You may need self affirmation, but the reason why your friends chose you was because they are attracted to the unique blend of qualities that's just the way you are. Of course im sure you need more than a list of your dislikes and likes to label to what a 'Jessica Tan' is. Because like you said, there are so many overlapping and contradictng layers in a person that its quite tough to peel it off one by one to see what it actually contains. This, referring to even the person trying to discover who he/she really 'is'. I may not know answers but im pretty sure that you'll get pass it and find what youre looking for, in addition to picking up lessons along the way. Because with love, faith and hope (maris stella! haha i cant remember the exact words) you'll mysteriously find the right answers.

Ok im losing my train of thought this ends for now. And jess? You are beautiful when you mean what you say.

2007-09-25T20:05:00.000-07:00

hello bellows
time check:
its 9 days till the end of promos
2 days since a lousy gp essay was written
8 days till lois birthday
10+ days till we get down to planning and celebrating that birthday
9 days and 4 weeks more spent doing pw
1 hour spent crying about results (optional)

countless countless countless days dwelling in the future.
depressing.

2007-09-17T03:43:00.000-07:00

Today was simply spilling with saccharine delights. Pardon the sudden dive into the whole girly mood. During break at the cafe, I took a look at my surroundings and zoomed in onto this girl who was looking out at the basketball court from the comfort of her spot despite the fact that she was oblivious to people watching her (ie: me). The object of affection? I followed her gaze to the boy who was dribbling a basketball at that time. She looked on quietly as he, who turned out to be her boyfriend, accidentally knocked his friend down and offered to help him up. The stuff people fail to realise!

After a lengthy and draining day in school i bussed home. 4pm! What started as a hot day ended with a relaxing stroll home. And! To my surprise i stumbled onto the path of this couple who were.. only 14/13? - Just infer from his school shorts! Must have been some ri/sji kid with his ny girlfriend. They were so cute together! The boy carrying his violin case on the right hand and holding the girl's hand on his left. Trying to prove his manhood hahahah! Back when I was sec 2 I never thought of myself as this cute and innocent :cD

Continued walking home, and I saw this pair of father and son trawling bushes for insects. The father pointed to the bush as though to educate his son on his friendly garden neighbours! Hahahah what a cheesy and idiotic post. But what i've seen today was terribly sweet and it was so heartwarming. A clear respite from the drones of school life. :cD

Imma going to nap now and dream my sleep (c:

My Bed is Like a Sailing Ship

My bed is like a sailing ship-
when I'm tucked in, I take a trip.
I leave behind my busy day
and sail to places far away.

I sail past beaches, gleaming white,
with palm trees swaying in the night.
I watch the waves break on the shore,
and then I see my bedroom floor!

I blink my eyes, I scratch my head-
my ship is home, I'm back in bed.
My ships goes sailing every night
and sails home in the morning light.

Cuteness!

2007-09-02T09:31:00.000-07:00

To think about it, my prayers said in the beginning of the year have been answered. I can't exactly pinpoint it but this sense of wholesomeness seems to permeate throughout. Of course. There are many other voids waiting to be filled. But this fluffy, light feeling seems to be slowly diffusing about the gaps and helping me towards building a better self. Like even jessica said, I've changed! I take this as a indication of positive progression. Hahah the funny thing is I forgot what I've prayed about but I do sense that that certain prayer has been answered.

OK THE POST SOUNDS LIKE CRAP
it seems really hard to pen my feelings. Like hard to find the right words and expressions.

Anywaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Last friday it was teachers day but heck we had touch training and me and the other girls went to lunch at this coffeeshop called broadway or whatever names and classy images these places try to conjure up. My prawn mee was disastrous and no that's not the point. The point is it's amazing that I can still meet interesting people in the heartlands. Like a bunch of caucasian acrobats ( I presume) travelling on 2m high bikes, definitely eye catching. And this deranged (I presume) middle aged man who fenced, did some chinese opera thingo, with a stick which morphed into a msian flag once you unrolled the contents. Um. Yea it's just interesting to know that you do get the occasional element of surprise while going through the drones of life. You know. I sound like some tired white collared worker overdosed on stress.

I want to type something but my brain's on the verge of shutting off so I guess it's goodbye.
Fare thee well.

2007-08-29T06:18:00.000-07:00

♥_________♥

☺☻☺

Some cute symbols ☻

2007-08-28T08:43:00.000-07:00

What's going on?

I'm feeling highly uncomfortable with myself. Like facing the usual conflicting desires to be myself, meaning to satisfy attempts to be comfortable with mysef, and yet having to suffer discomfort all for the better of oneself.

But of course, trials and tribulations shape and harden one.

With the other typical procrastinating thoughts floating around, I sense a looming urge to study (yea you get the point, study) Occasionally you get the .. I forgot what I was about to say.

Read the comic Bizarro in today's Lifestyle section. This guy commented that He was the leader of this nation and yea, this almighty place was procrasti-nation. Harh harh harh.

I do wonder what would happen if I can pull myself together and actually do something seriously and wholeheartedly. Just for once.

For now, the only reality would be that my diesel bag did appear not just once, but plenty of times in this korean drama Alone in Love. Great watch. Woohoo!

Pray for me please. That my imagination doesn't run wild and NOTHING WILL DISTRACT ME. Please pray for me.

I hate whining.

2007-08-22T12:54:00.000-07:00

pw is disgusting.
It's 4am in the early morning and music from the computer drones on and on and on.
plates from dinner still not washed?

student, take care.

2007-08-19T02:38:00.000-07:00

Desire
I want a crappy shirt to wear and tear
an oatmeal tin to hit on and
focus light to burn images
This week has been going well
I need to focus
hocus
pocus
disapparate
hopefully not
I want a sense of security
for my emotional wellbeing
more than this

I need punctuations here

2007-08-06T09:30:00.000-07:00

Everytime, I fall prey
I turn blind,
I am blind.

But I know better.

To Be Deciphered.

2007-08-01T07:36:00.000-07:00

yiiiiiiiiippie.

I'm going karimun island for OCIP and i sense that it's going to be a blast. I'm going to learn so much and have so much fun teaching the kids to speak english! :cD I love indo yes you heard me right I think it's like around the riau islands, 2 plus hour ferry ride from singapore?

no tsunamis
no earthquakes
no human trafficking
no insurgencies or i dont know whats
no religious conflicts

hahahahahha you know that was sarcasm but i really can't wait for it. This year .. turned out to be rather different after all. But let's leave that for another 5 months.

It's the 7th month and so much has happened. The upcoming 5 months may bring about surprises. And I'll be in karimun stocking up on wow whee mee goreng my fav :cD

2007-07-31T06:34:00.000-07:00

I've been typing about superficial stuff nowadays so it's high time to update everyone about myself ahahahhahahaha myself.

But then i wouldn't have much to say because such petty details pretty much make up my life. But anyway the distance between everyone can just be too great at times. Sometimes you feel you could share the joys and sorrows with your friends and they would understand it perfectly, albeit drawing from their formed perspectives. But such physical blocks stand in your way, that schedules clash, that's there's just too little time. But such habits stand in your way, you're just so forward looking and independent that the reliance on your friends is far far away. You lead your own life, they lead theirs. You attempt to reach across to merge the paths. Of course i know that it's wrong, deep down I'm fully aware that I'm heading the wrong direction. So many 'ifs' and not much action taken. Yet I'm pretty unsure of what the right way really is. where the right way is. I should let my subconscious take over.

And don't all we sc girls share the same love for the school compound. It looks gorgeous at night, mysterious, comfortable, and captivating.Very alluring and charming. After the band concert on sat its music lingered on deep down inside and i sat on the swing with lois enjoying the night breeze and the warm shadows cast on the bricked floors. No eerie feelings, just pure security and comfort. You could almost let go of yourself and lie back, immersing yourself in the familiar darkness. How do you say it. Its a really unique experience.

we'll see better days ahead.

2007-07-25T01:18:00.001-07:00

Today was discovery fiesta in sa! Gladys, Cheryl, Kahhwee and I attended the fun courses. Presenting.. Balloon sculpting!

I wanted to attach a leash to the dog )c:

A flower and another flower and another flower.

Hahah a balloon ring

And yes, today is Wanyin's birthday! Happy birthday wanyin! That cuckoo sent me a message early in the morning calling me a scatter brain cos I clean forgot that today was her birthday! SORRY I'M TERRIBLY SORRY I FEEL REALLY HORRIBLY APOLOGETIC )c: Yess after balloon sculpting (I overcame my fear of balloons) the bunch of us including jasmine went for the sign language workshop! You need tons of patience to be able to converse in sign language, which I totally lack, other than that, we had good fun learning how to sign "brother" and "sister" in Japanese sign language! HAHAH you wouldn't be able to guess how to sign that (point the middle finger at the person for "brother", point the pinky for "sister") I learnt how to sign as well as spell "I love you" in sign (c:

And that spelt "I love you friend" in sign. To wanyin!

Sweet sweet seventeen like uh honey drizzling and citrus icing mmhm :cD

2007-07-23T08:05:00.000-07:00

i dont careeee i wanna whineeeee i'm gonna bloggggg
i have so much homework and projects and presentations and events coming up i think i'm gonna cry anytime soon
figuratively though.

Met up with my ac classmates today hoooohooooooo gabuzles of fun hahahaha gabuzles Happy Birthday Lynette yea yea yea yea

Well aside from that, school simple stinks to the core.
We'll be damned!

2007-07-18T05:07:00.000-07:00

yo school has been totally draining and i wanna say i'm one of the few lucky ones who hasnt succumbed to yea the school blues.

school blues
school blues
school blues

um ok fine i always wear this ugly frown about school but that's because the muscles around my lip area aren't firm! I swear im going to appreciate what i've got and make the best of it! And like the people around me all have their group of support and i have mine too! i'm going to extend a hand to administer love and care and concern to people around me!
hahahahahhahahahah so inspiring. lets get across the first hurdle, my anti-everything.

Thank you and let's doze off.

2007-07-03T05:21:00.000-07:00

i'm really exhausted.
the dread with every step
the hollowness of the heart
digging new depths with every passing day
i see no light
curling into a wrinkled form

that's basically my day.
there's so much to look forward to, yet so much to fear.
hope gets you by.

2007-06-19T19:32:00.000-07:00

Exhibit B - Before

S ome amazing ppppppppiktures to blow your mind, including the debut photographs from amateur photographer... LWY. (yes wanyin it's yOOOOOOu.) Photo blog! I edited a few pictures so the tiny details are blown up.

The first few photos were taken when I was out with up and coming photographer LWY, on a road trip to god forsaken pasir panjang for desserts. UNfortunately, no photos were taken though we spent a lovely time eating a slice of orginal cheesecake and chocolate ..cake. Expected a long hard to pronounce name eh! The initial pictures were taken at the holland v busstop where we waited for 1 hour for the bus that didn't come (we were all along at the wrong bus stop) So anyway, fast forward we found ourselves at the right bus stop when the bus finally arrived. Photos were taken at mid afternoon so the sunrays are kind of soft, shown by the photo with the rays on the legs.

And one fine day, I found myself snapping away at the glorious sky, whilst walking to jessica's house.

Exhibit D - Different from A and C

Exhibit A - After

In all its glory. Notice the beams of rays coming from behind the clouds? The wonders of . editing. Goo-bai.

2007-06-18T12:12:00.001-07:00

i'm having a bad case of watcha call it - dandruff or flakes of scalp falling or what so ever.

Anyway the reason why im in such a miserable plight is no thanks to pantene's hair loss control shampoo. And no i'm not having any hair loss problem. And i hate the dry state of my scalp. Its like having this forest -desert like environment for a head. Quite a torture isn't it.

When I was young I swore to become a lawyer when I grew up so I could sue everything that ever harmed me, but voila . Circumstances insisted on pressing on and I have no idea what i'm typing but Pantene is lucky that i have since given up the thought of being a lawyer. I can't stop scratching my head and seeing falling flakes of scalp just pains my head, and heart.

Pantene had better brush up on its technology. Or else.. Or ELSE...

2007-06-17T08:50:00.000-07:00

BUSY BUSY BUSY BUSY LIKE A BEE BEE BUSY BUZZ BUZZ BUSY BUSY LIKE A BEE BEE

When desperation is unleashed, there’s no stopping to what a human can do. Never underestimate it.

What’s next after desperation? Divine intervention hopefully? Pretty please?

2007-06-15T22:47:00.000-07:00

I told myself to get up at 9am to blog before studying? I guess it failed. (again)

Anyway, yesterday was a great day. Photo blog!

whilst plucking mud off my boots during training at farrer park, i saw this FULL rainbow overhead, above the whole lot of buildings. Lovely (c: Though oggy was wondering what the big deal about rainbows were. Reminds me of this day way back in sc where we were singing the

school song and this rainbow formed across the sky.

Ok the photos are seriously taking forever to load.

After training jiayi and I took a bus down to bukit timah, i felt that we had a nice lazy afternoon chat. But anyway I dropped off after hwa chong and met up with the 4PR people! I was rather early for once. Supposed to wait for other people to arrive before going to jiayun's house so tingwei, denise and I chatted about our lives and yea, the usual.

So, we FINALLY went to jiayun's house, hungry and all. A whole spread of delicious looking food was awaiting us! I ate SO SO SO much. In between bites the whole lot of us gossiped, yes the usual again. A fair bit of so called camwhoring, laughing, catching up, more camwhoring.

Trying out the night effects coupled with shaky hands.

we were supposed to look full!

act glam la

By 10, half of the original party goers (!) were gone. The remaining decided to bus down to serene to eat more? It's been awhile since I've walked in the night with a bunch of friends, you know that wonderful feeling you get, seeing constellations in the sky and hearing the blare of hiphop music from a random handphone.

Disrupted the peace at macs with our joyous ruckus. Ahha! Camwhored more with kaeting's super cool apple laptop, with all the photobooth effects and all. Super funny. It totally mutated our features, and jiayun looked boxed up.

The photos are taking forever to load!

Um so afterwards jiayun and I took the 156 home, and I definitely have to mention this. It was the first time I sat on the nokia bus, total with lounge like seats and odd post pop music blaring! I was so excited upon entering the bus that I slipped and fell, knelt on my knees, and grazed my leg. Suprisingly I started laughing, and Jiayun was so busy laughing she spent 3/8 of the journey doing that and I couldn't rant about the bus! She's my lucky charm, cos I had been wanting to try out the nokia bus since like months ago (c: I guess it was a good day, just catching up with friends who have gone to different places and seeing what they're doing now. You know, the usual. I spent the rest of the bus ride enjoying linkin park smiling to myself.

Jiayun posing for the camera for the countless time. Look at the cool lounge chairs! :cD My decision to go out with the class was RIGHT.

Ended the day with this classic old chinese film entitled 'Comrades, almost a love story' by leon lai and maggie cheung. It's like super slow paced and great for lulling people to sleep. Just kidding la, it's just a nice artsy film to watch before sleeping. Saves you the effort of reading a bed time story. Maggie cheung is damn hot ok! (So is leon -when he was younger HAHA)

Alright it has been such a lengthy post, I think it's rather incoherent cos I'm not in focus mode now but. Another story for another time! Me thinks it's time to hit the books.

2007-06-08T11:08:00.000-07:00

i'm fine, i'm found, no worries.

On monday, I went to the derma for my annual check up. I mean, recently there's been this whole wave/surge of pimples I just go kraaaaazey and ruffle my hair out of despair. So the doc said I had to stop stuffing myself with kfc and start hitting the organic cafe at holland v. This means, more spending! Oh my gosh what have I got myself into. My mom flew into a rage since the total medication and fees and what have yous added up to 150+. I mean. I can't help it if I scratch my pimples and in the end it blows up and resemble fireant bites. I look like a red puffer fish.

I was lying, you liar. I gave up trying to work out the perfect lie. Sounding angsty dude.

Anyhows, I spent my unfruitful week.. yeap you got it. Vicious cycle as I always put it. Got a new laptop though; you slave. Jess and I came up with this horribly delicious plan and we're so sure we're gonna hit the jackpot. No prizes for guessing. We're back in the business (baby) Hahaha to put the reaction in typical msn speak -SHUDDDERS-

Meeting up with your loved ones just makes you feel all fuzzy and warm and i'm thinking rich golden honey oozing out yes. Today with xinya gave me the chance to know her better, and of course, get updated on her interesting life and the neverending worries (for her friends that is) she has. Such a nice person isn't she (c: And later I did a little research at holland v's anthropology (tee hee hee) before meeting jess for tea. She's a great listener, listening to all my selfish narcissistic thoughts and it was delightful being able to share our dreams with each other. With her and her scorching aztec sun and thoughtprovokokokoking dream in contrast to mine where I just laughed and chatted with the 'inhabitants of the busstop'. Queer indeed. But today was drizzling honey and tomorrow shall be.. tira-MISS-YOU? Hahaha awfully . gross.

till then.
flap your fat fab flabs. try it.

2007-05-31T13:05:00.000-07:00

so it seems
I may not seem as busy as other people
..
But I still life as it is.

CCA comes to a standstill, mustered up the courage ( also the long term procrastination finally reaches a point where action has to be taken) to paint the walls of my room, clear out clutter. That day, I really released every thought that has been weighing on my mind, and enjoyed the sunday afternoon with wanyin.

I feel good.
I'm actually working, and the benefits are making it worthwhile. Selling icecream at chinatown on thurs and fri, it's really tiring and draining and (yes, boring) but the little children (did I mention CUTE?) make my day. Eyes trained like a paedophile's, catching the attention of any cute wandering children, making the first steps of smiling at them. Some smile, some hide behind their parents, some gaze back with fishball round eyes (yes the cutest catch of the day). I love kids!

I'm going to catch up with myself. What I'm seeing is the person I knew 3/4 of a year ago; rushing to race with time. Read 'five people you meet in heaven' just yesterday after purchasing it from borders. Unfortunately, fails to be life changing and inspiring, along those lines, but stirs up creativity and ideas spring up once again. Thought provoking I must say, and right after I placed down the book at the unearthly hour of 3am, the jasmin wong from across the globe sent me an sms, which I found it much of a coincidence. Lovely.

Now, to catch up with studies and pray that a new computer is on its way. My saviour, my overdued gp essay.

Did I cover the food aspect? (c:

2007-05-25T08:35:00.000-07:00

I want to SHOP.
Everything and Everything! Keep in mind, global warming. I need to be sensible and limit my expenses. So much for being pragmatic!

Today was just a demoralising day )c: But I think it's just the thing to motivate myself. I feel ready to massacre everything! Yea seriously.
But one good, rather great thing that happened was that the girls soccer team defeated vj to clinch the first placing! They snatched the championship title right from under vj's noses! So there, and I'm so proud of maria, she won the ..oh-so-prestigious GOLDEN BOOT award! Hahaha how retarded can a day get. But that was one good event to keep in mind. (c:

2007-05-24T08:38:00.000-07:00

I feel idle. Especially in school.
School makes me feel useless!
And I'm learning nothing. Something that's nothing.
help. I'm incoherent.
inherocent.

Anyway after a horribly slow, lazy, (no surprises) sloth-like day in school. I slacked at j8 for goodness gracious me - 1 plus hour. I've never felt such boredom in my whole life. Especially mounting boredom, leftovers from school. I think I'm beginning to dislike school BUT I MUST CONSISTENTLY SOUND CLICHE AND GIVE PEP TALKS TO MYSELF TO STOP THINKING THIS WAY. Hokays um I met shun and lois and we headed for cafe cartel where I had - OXTAIL STEW WITH RICE. :cO Delightful! The contents of our highly interesting conversation are too heavy to be typed in here. Let's procrastinate (again? GROANS~**~*~*~~**~*~) and leave it till next time!

Till next time!

2007-05-20T09:40:00.000-07:00

Good news for most of the girls whom entered my life a mere 2 months ago - free chinese new year goodie tasting- vanilla cupcake awaiting your presence in school tomorrow! Originally there was a plan to spread icing across the VCCs. Unfortunately like all previous baking attempts, surprises occur and the whole supposedly 100% cupcake direction just switched and voila, you've just got to live cny all over again, just without the egg rolls and red your mom wears during those unbearable 15 days.

Okay gibberish ends NOW.

I was ticked off by my wonderful sis but oh we are (or rather, I am) back to the lovely dovey (?) 'but most of all, we love each other' mode. Guzzles fuel for recharge. I need/crave/would really have to have/must have/demand SLEEP.

Stab GP, Stab LCS, Pray and hope his motorcycle falls apart and his boots tear and he gets stuck in unlikely quicksand today. An unfortunate curse bestowed upon him, you hear him sneeze 24km away..

A long day ahead.

-
To side track a little, sat was one of the not so bad I like it days, where nothing much interesting happened but I still happen to learn alot therefore like it. Kickstarted the day with a long hike up the slope to the soccer field in (zen/modern/futuristic/everything you just can't think of) republic poly and participated in the smu touch rug carnival. Enriching I must admit. That's about it. I went for lunch before zooming off for cell and church. I like church. (c:

Stab LCS, Stab GP, Stab dreadful essay due in 5 hours time.

2007-05-07T07:44:00.000-07:00

I feeel haaaaaaaaaaaapaye. (simple emotions, but mean a great deal!)
Why so?
I don't know why too.
But, I still CAN'T GET USED TO MY CLASS
SOMEONE (GOD) PLEASE HELP ME ADJUST TO LIFE.
Stop being such a recluse huh.
)c:

I miss food. I miss food!
I want to whine and tear the whole world apart, in search of FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD.
I have set my sights on myanmar cuisine.
Hereeee I comeeee!
(WANYIN TAKE HEED IN WORDS OF WISDOM)

Anyway the past few days have been filled with pure gastronomical delights, though I've encountered some nasty ones along the path to seeking fulfillment in FOOD.
In school, I am well-fed. Period.
Friday, hopped over to sc to check out the band before going out with amilyn. Showered ourselves with fish and chips and xiao long baos from tanglin cc ('tis horrendous, approach with wary) and this was followed by.. chicken curry - bread dip. Tantalising. Walked about bukit timah plaza for night walks and settled on this cafe called attitude (hip name huh). Thus, had jellyhearts for dessert! Absolute saccharine.
Sat, met up with dear wanyin at peninsula plaza to purchase soccer boots - TOTAL RIPOFF. A quick check at queensway shows that the same pair cost 20 bucks less )c: Anyway we hopped to uh. Cuppage Plaza and POOF! My japanese authentic ramen stall was MISSING. So, we had to make do with yakitori and udon bento which still tasted FAB. Plus, I stuffed myself with good ol' ang ku kuehs, waffle with kaya (!).. and went to church. Ate CHICKEN RICE! Basically that pretty sums up my food exploits. Ran about 7 km for touch rug today, so my calories are all burnt out. It's a vicious cycle, I say.

More FOOD.

2007-05-05T08:28:00.000-07:00

to sum up today's events:

FOOD
CHURCH
BITCHING
FOOD
WANYIN
BOOTS
CHURCH
HAPPY AND SATISFIED!

shall elaborate on the food part sooooooooooon.
Anyway I feel horrible after bitching, I need to stop. Today?

2007-05-01T09:23:00.000-07:00

CMON EVERYBODY! LET'S ALL OGLE AT BLOGGER!

No sleep tonight
No sleep tonight

This shall be the chant I'll recite till early morning.
Farewell and hope to see you, alive.
Till death and project work do us apart.

2007-04-29T08:31:00.000-07:00

Dang-o-dang-o-dang! Dumbbell ling-a-ling-ling.
I need to start on my PI NOW
NOW
NOW
NOW
PLEASE STOP PROCRASTINATING. IT'S ONLY 2 MORE DAYS

Today was something out of the ordinary,
We (the family) had an unexpected visit from auntie!! (our ex maid)
How am I feeling you ask?
Well.. Varied responses.. Really odd. Really odd.
Adieu!

2007-04-28T11:33:00.000-07:00

Long time no blog ah.
Today very bored leh,
So decide to see see tok cok dot com.
Si beh song ah. Shiok until shake two leg.

I see funny things so copy and paste below. Friend enough not?!

CHIBABOOM/TERBABOOM
Quintessential Singaporean sound effect for an explosion.
1. "Then ah, the bomb essploded... CHIBABOOM!"
2. "Wah lau, wha'ppen to your hair? Terbaboom like that."

LOANMAI (Contributed by Edwin)
(lone-muy)
A local contraction of "If you don't mind..."
"Eh, Ah Seng, loanmai pass me the diskette with the sales file inside, can or not?"

PALALALOGRAM (Contributed by J.T.)
The typical Singaporean Chinese-educated English Maths teacher's/lecturer's pronunciation of 'parallelogram'. Most commonly heard in mathematics classes in Uni, JC, Poly and Sec School. Often heard among students too.
"Eh, how to find the area of this palalalogram, ha?

SEMEN MIXTURE
A very unfortunate mispronunciation of “cement mixer”.

UNTAHANTABLE (Contributed by Wayne Jamiro & Petrina)
Unbearable. Derived from the Malay word 'tahan' meaning to 'endure' or 'bear'.
"Adoi, the weather nowadays so damn hot, it's bloody untahantable, man."

X
There are currently no X entries because in Singlish, X can always be replaced by Ss, as in "eskew","essciting" and "ess-ray".

(Switches to a faux british accent)
Now, wasn't that funny.

-

Just a snippet into my nonsensical shitz when I'm reliving my ENNUI, (woah, cheem shitz man!)
Okay I had better stop using singlish. It's killing my standard of english. Till then, Buh BYE!

2007-04-23T08:16:00.000-07:00

Nowadays I seem to drift about schoool without any purpose. Thus, feeling empty and hollow as where and when. BUT, TODAY WAS DIFFERENT! well, a little. I went for worship in the morning and came out of it a slightly changed person!

Saturate my souuuuuuul..
Saturate my souuuuuul..
I want my daily bread!

I shall probably make it a habit to go for worship thrice a week.
Meanwhile, school still was a drear though I paid slightly more attention during tutorials! I am seriously the most hardworking girl in lit. Cross my heart and hope to die if I were to be found lying.

Anyway it poured and rained and lightning raged and all that jazz so TOUCH RUG WAS CANCELLED! I was screaming with glee I tell you (deep down.) So, me and kahhwee bussed down to KAP to meet ah jee! (Wanyin came later). Session filled with nothing else but pure laughter. Without the accompaniment of my sc girls and kahhwee, life itself as well as in sa (definitely) would be OH THE ANGUISH I CAN'T BEAR. You get the drift.

Started singing halfway in macs and this woman found it amusing, and couldn't stop chortling. This got me started on my laughing fits and soon 4 of us plus the lone woman who was trying to curb her laughter by staring at the wall were just.. in our own worlds, laughing. The woman's friend came back and was amused by the sight of her friend laughing to herself.

Sorry for the limited vocab. I need to undergo upgrading. Self development. so.. till then!
2.4 tomorrow! Panic attacks! Spasm.

2007-04-22T09:08:00.000-07:00

'ola!

Quix update for now, since it's 19 minutes past my supposed bedtime. SHOPPING UPDATES: I bought this cute lunch box by crazy animals! at holland v with ah jee (jess). She bought the marshmallow lunch box! How.. fluffy! While waiting for photos to load, I shall rant about sports day!

Friday: Twas sports day. Two events, 4 hours. Unfortunately the virgin experience (of sports day in sa) was marred by the disappearance of 4/6 boys from my class (the girls found out that they were meeting in east coast for LAN.) 6-4= 2 meaning we (the class) were disqualified from 10 x 200m races since we needed to have a min of 5 guys to RUN! First time was unbelievably, unfortunately unfortunate. Shakes head in dispair. On a lighter note, I'm starting to like my school with touch rugby and all. Though the girls here are way better than the guys - from my class, whose chivalry and probably level of responsibility = CLOSE to zilch, so much so that I may renounce my straight ways days and turn bi. Um oooookay, just kaaading. So much for trying to sound funny. Ka-ching photos are here. Let's get a move on.

What happened during the week:

Diamonds are a girl's best friend. (cheaper form of happiness whom jodie wanyin and jiaxin tried to present)

The bigger the diamond (after being soaked in water for 3 days), the better. I had no intention of looking freaky here!

Birthday balloon, which I hung on the window ledge for a brief moment, before deciding to cut the strings and watch it float away ( see time flying in the physical form!)

A typical chinese meal.

HIGHLY ANTICIPATED, MUCH AWAITED AC CLASS REUNION.

Lastly,

My new lunchbox.

See you later, alligator!! (c:

2007-04-19T10:34:00.000-07:00

Just took a long nap from 5 to 10! 5 hours!!
Now I CAN'T SLEEP. Gosh.

School wise, it will be fun. I will dutifully do all my work and bounce back. Life will be enjoyable.

I just found out stuff about my new classmates that kind of wavers my wanting to know them better. I am skeptical about their personalities.

High and Dry by Radiohead. Great for moods like htis.

2007-04-18T08:57:00.000-07:00

I don't feel like doing homework, especially when there's this ever rising pile of worksheets waiting to be done. Stresss.

In addition to having cca three times a week, and pe two times a week. I need to rest my feet.
And pass my dumb 2.4 and pull ups.
And think of ways on how to lead an un-mundane school life,
Clear my pimples.
Stop sleeping so late and getting eyebags as a result

Youth. Oh the bustle and buzz.

Reminder: Buy daffodils and bake (c:

Hello Wanyin, I had a nice chat over dinner with you! Hope you enjoyed it as much as I do and know that I'm very very proud of you for being able to face your problems and overcoming it! More updates soon! (Like, next week?!)

2007-04-17T06:19:00.000-07:00

Yes I shall continue from the previous post. My birthday ended with a ride back home with jessica, just like old (HAH) times, filled with the usual updates and thingamajigs.

SAT was a blast. I slept till like late afternoon before meeting jiaxin, wanyin and jodie at holland v. They tricked me! They said they would be late! The thing was, I was the latest to arrive! To think I actually had the guts to throw tantrums around )c: SORRY, and thanks for the birthday surprise though it .. sorta failed?! But I love it anyhows (c:

There at breadtalk, there they were, holding a balloon that said "It's the time for your birthday!" with a bag full of queer stuff; ie: pie tasting lip glooosss, a red pen that's capable of blowing bubbles, and some rubber fake diamond ring that can expand to 100 times its size if you soak in water. Photos up soon!

Anyway I caught up with them and we cabbed to rj, where lois had her first concert in rj! The concert was hell good! I mean, they sang really well esp raffles voices (HAHAH) and lois was really pretty with her make up and all that! he he he he. Ok enough of it. We bummed around after the concert, waiting for lois while she packed up before munching kfc at j8. As usual, like all old chums do, we talked about school life and lois was HILARIOUS MAN. She was crapping about her interesting love life (woah jasmin, lots to catch up!!) and I was totally grossed out.

Ah well that's it for now. Blog another time. Photos up another time yet again.
(c:

2007-04-15T09:56:00.000-07:00

It's like, really late now but I like it and I'm going to continue blogging at a fast pace so I will not get scolded by my mom and attempt to get into bed by 1am (yes, shockingly 1am)

Unfortunately it's 3 minutes left to 1am so I will extend the deadline till 1.15am.

I suppose, try as I might, I may like SA after all. For one, my class is an interesting mix. Never seen before personalities. (I sound like a walking ad.) I would not even have the chance to encounter people like them if I had gone elsewhere. Welllllllllllllll. I will find another time to delve into this topic. It may take up 2 posts. Did I mention that I've found my first hater? This is getting interesting.

Um, and I know that I can't let school take up the major part of my life, because it would kill me to live such a meaningless and lifeless life (<- take note) if you would take away school. Fill my life! Fill!

Ok before I sleep I shall talk about thurs and sat (c: Thurs was great! I mean who would like birthdays to fall on a day with school ending at 5.30pm?! But thurs was an exception. I thought everyone wouldn't remember my birthday (since I didn't mention it to anyone), but LOOK! smses came in throughout the day and BOY WAS I HAPPY. I do admit that I was rather down in the morning, trying to bury my head into churning out analysis after analysis of poems (ok it wasn't THAT bad) but still. Oh and I saw my eye candy 4 times in a row! :cD (that's not the point, since I gave up on him already.) And the weather was horrible. It kept raining and pe was cancelled (meaning I waited in school till 5 for nothing).

But Chiam appeared and gave me a slice of cake! Ah Jee crashed sa and surprised with another slice of cake!

2007-04-11T10:50:00.000-07:00

I - am - brave.
I - am - thankful - for - great - support - pillars - of - strength.

which is, no doubt, inclusive of my daily dose of classical music whenever I do homework.
update more in a near future.
let's say, in a day or two? :c)

2007-04-06T06:48:00.000-07:00

I must admit, that I do have a horrible temper that can be hard to curb at times.

Thank goodness I am calm. and composed. now. 5 mins ago, I was FUMING MAD. 5 mins later though, it's a whole new story. I hate my temper and my bitch fits. Thank God it blows over in a quickie.

I have to stop fighting with my sister. And being so mean to her and my mom.

But they are like @&!$#(&$(!* at times! Especially irritating when they refuse to apologise. (over trivial matters)

Alright I'm being such a bitch here and dishing out unglam facts about myself and I sound like some egomaniac who always thinks that I'm always right. Well. That's it for cool down.

2007-04-05T08:54:00.000-07:00

Ah finally the last day of school! I don't know why but sometimes I feel as though I hate the school and probably the inhabitants of the school because the only thing they're great at is sulking in the morning (by which i mean SAINT ANDREWS). Other times, I feel as though I could settle in comfortably without a hitch because I have great friends here in sa, and all hope isn't lost.

Wellllllllllllllllllllll, many thoughts were swarming in my head this morning/afternoon. I guess you could say I choose to busy myself with these thoughts and sulk/stone/act angsty )c: Luckily I was to meet up with Wanyin and Qian later in the day. Which turned out ot be the best part of the day. Went for dinner at Wisma, and chatted for like 2 hours I suppose. At first I was really silent, like being my usual angsty self after being forced to stay back in school till like, 5. Sulking over my plight (self pity, really pathetique) But wanyin and Qian kept rambling, and I just couldn't help but get influenced by their chatty moods. In no time, I joined the gang. Shared school stuff and the usual. Thought of many pun filled phrases, and cracked jokes. Well then, that's about it for nwo. A short snippet of my life.

2007-04-02T08:38:00.000-07:00

Geez I want to go to the Yosemite and Yellowstone National Park!!!! RIGHT NOW. Before Global Warming sets in and destroys our beautiful earth. I have a sudden urge to see moose and geysers. Ah Geography!

New word learnt: Kitsch : Sentimentality or vulgar, often pretentious bad taste, especially in the arts: "When money tries to buy beauty it tends to purchase a kind of courteous kitsch" (William H. Gass).

Well. Back to Michelle's Tale. Life in sa has been pretty calm, nothing much stirring. I make sure that I'm well fed thank you. And before you know it, I'll be stuffing myself with hokkien mee and overdosing. (deelicious!) . Can't really click that well with my new classmates though, and I really hope to find close knit buddies to weather the 2 years together. I can't complain much, because sa is a really safe haven (or I may think so) and there's not much conflicts. (As for the teachers.. let's leave it for another time.) Ah well. I'm glad for the sc girls/ ac rejects company when the occasional loneliness gets to me. Though it's already april, I feel as though it's the first day of school. This being my third week in sa.

Nothing much to talk about sa. So I shall leave you to comprehend the tidbits and have a nice day.

2007-03-25T09:59:00.000-07:00

money woes. for real?

2007-03-20T08:44:00.000-07:00

it is windy.
it is night.
it is rolling thunder all around.

no, not an attempt at creating poetry.
in any case, it's so surreal now, and i think that slow odd songs would complete the whole scene.
i realised i haven't been in contact with jasmin or lois for some time. time to type away!

i prayed to God and asked him to show me my future spouse in my dreams, since pastor mary adams did the same thing for her friend. guess what i saw.

i was playing with my sa class ( im in 07a08 btw), and out of the corner of my eye, i saw 2 guys. exact replicates of each other, complete with the hairy pale freak you out legs and out of this world greasy hair. think rimario from xman. greasy, spiky, horrible, revolting hair.

that's enough.
today, i garnered laughter from many people after i recounted this incident to them.
it's ok, beauty is more than skin deep, isn't it.

speaking of which, im sure many people noticed that we are around eligible age right now. everyone, like seriously MOST people are getting attached because..? just because. No one knows why.

i'm glad everyone is settling snuggly into their school environments. for me, i'll take things one step at a time. (c: oh yes, i found a filipino friend jurane, who like me, is an ac reject. i cant wait to go to her house for a sumptuous dinner of exotic filipino fare! YESS!

so then, it's back to reality. and have a nice day. Life is unpredictable. i'm feeling vulnerable, and i am so not in control of my life.
goodnight. goodnight. goodnight.

2007-03-17T02:17:00.000-07:00

hello bellows once again. just came back from a 20 hour snooze (dont ask me why im feeling horrible now)

all i want ... is to fly to north america and ride on mooses (?!) all day long. buy a pair of antlers to complement with them, and blend into the redwoods.

2007-03-13T08:38:00.000-07:00

*̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ,*̡͌l̡* <- COOL NO!

and yes, i counted down, with sam accompanying me at the new urban male while i was purchasing my david and goliath 'omelette smarter than you think!' tamago shirt.

..4 hours after the closing time, i found out that tim and joseph got back into ac. heart shattered, i feel left out.

..5 hours after the closing time, i've calmed down. whatever that happens next is up to God to decide. Though i really really hope that i can spend my 2 important transition to uni years in ac though. it'll be so memorable, waking up at 6.30am, taking my own sweet time and reaching school at 7am. hanging loose with all my friends.

THE LIFE!

2007-03-12T11:29:00.000-07:00

G'day all! today was a rather ok-normal-average-walk-a-ton kind of day.

did maris stella, got high cycling on the innovative merry go round, got chased out by the warden (?), sneaked back in and got sent out by the sister. :cO good heavens! walked to dempsey road, followed by the botanical gardens and saw plenty of bio species along the way. ie: a dead mynah, a pair of butterflies, many webs and furry pink leaves. Trudged about the b.gardens, tried to prove that spiders spin sturdy webs, acted like some photographer in the making, slapped mosquito bites on thunder thighs, and identified many species of whatevers.

by the time we ended our hike, me and ah jee were dead beat. so we went to tanglin mall to chill and there was the place where i had a bowl of korean ramen that turned out to be instant mee. (rip off!) uhhh... browsed far east before heading to the mrt station where (highlight of the day) : we crashed the id photo booth and had our own photo session! took tons of photos and i simply cant wait for ah jee to send me pics so i can post it here for all to see (c: its really cool because of all the flashes and all, kind of inhouse studio quality shots? OK and i went back to sc for band camp and suffered bouts of angst beside the band board, sulking about my 0.00001% of making it to ac.

this sounds really shallow with all the details about my day yada yada and whats not.

kickstarting my day with a yum-tum-tum breakfast with ling before venturing on my (un-rare) shopping spree with sam tomorrow! AND, counting down the hours before the appeal thing closes with jess (c:

hope for the best! (well, michelle says that 'at most join cooking club and churn up poisonous broth for your family lor') NO BIGGIE.

2007-03-10T23:49:00.000-08:00

ah i've finally managed to upload the ac school badge picture phuture like.
here you go. (rolls out picture)

yay next week is gonna be fab and fabuluso! i dig holidays. (c:

i seriously can't wait for tomorrow, because i am going to CRASH. (yes, it is definitely not a hallucination on your part) ..... (percussion ensem bings bangs rahrahs bongos and whatever-s) maris stella! (kindergarden)

hurrah! hurrah! it's going to be so much fun (c: plus my rain movie and going back to sc for band camp and attempting to give my room a much needed project makeover with ah jee, i think i'm going to love my day!

on a side note, Friday has taught me to stick to my decisions, and not waver. I have a weak will, and i intend to change that. Also, I'm going to to to to save up money so i can travel at the end of my j1/2 year, and experience life as it is, without the usual rip offs family tours and what so ever. At the start of every few months, I'm probably going to embark on some project to showcase my entrepreneurial spirit and earn quix moneh and pray i won't squander off my new found wealth. ka-ching!

now then, time to scoot and paste photos on my wall (c:

2007-03-09T01:24:00.000-08:00

today was hell of a busy day, zippped to sa, then cj, then ib, then acj. (long story) oh yea at cj i saw like tim, joseph and matthew. gosh i miss all of them )c:
busy with appeals to cj. i think i better consult jeow about cj. does God really want me in sa? really? REALLY? it's so bloody far. cj is so far toooooooo. )c:
why not ac God? ac!!!?!??!

meanwhile, i'm going to rest and get ready for ac campfire that's going to happen in like uh..... half an hour's time? DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY. and oh. wait till reality sinks in the week after march hols. i hope i won't be like depressed for a whole year and waste my jc life away.

side note to friends: i just found out that my eye candy ain't in ac anymore! WHERE IS HE!? double woe woe. woe am i (hums to 'autumn in my heart' HAHA) well then, that's it and goodbye!

2007-03-08T07:39:00.000-08:00

again, im feeling rather dejected now. went to sa in the morning and um. let me check my handbook. had worship, where i just sobbed because i felt stressed over my ac appeal. everyone said that the chances are really slim, so it'll really be a miracle if i got in. and there are only 40 places, mainly reserved for cca appeal students. so. no chance?

just skip the sa games and reach the main point. wanted to go to ac right after mass games, but i couldn't hail a single cab because they were changing shifts at hougang, so i had to like cross the darn long bridge that hovers over the highway, so i could hail a cab at the opp bus stop. no luck there, so i took 151 down to bukit timah so i could hail a cab. cost me 45 mins. (yes i'm pissed)

when i reached the gates, it struck me as a comfortable, yet foreign place. walked in, and i saw so many people i didn't know at all. saw so many . so many. joan was the first person to approach me. i was so touched by her concern, and she kindly walked me across the foreign bleachers to my og. when i saw them, when i saw clara, when they asked about sa, i just couldn't help but burst into tears. i know i'm being incoherent now, but thats how my state of mind is now, its just in a whirl. luckily my ogmates hugged me and comforted me. now that made me feel better. and it goes to show how much i missed ac. I REALLY MISS AC! lao shi was like, see now you regret your choice right. saw so many people there and talked to them, and the best part of the day was definitely pigging out with my ac friends in good ol' holland v, and meeting up with koon there. see how much influence the ac family has on my moods.

whatever. i can only pray and pray for a miracle. the path i will take, eventually handled and chosen by God. what if he puts me in SAJC!?!??!?! OR CJC!?!? (i'm appealing to cj right tomorrow after 'THE QUEST' in sa) tomorrow! ac campfire! (yes i'm ditching sa to cling to ac. cling on to my life.)

this sounds out of context, but in response to the love triangle problem i typed about yesterday,

it is better to have loved and lost,
than to not have loved at all. (roughly like this)

my eye bags are at its darkest. this week is one hell of a week.

2007-03-07T03:40:00.001-08:00

im feeling really blah now. like, totally blah and zoned.

lois said her first day at ib 'SUCKED', quoted directly from her.
sumin said her first day at nj 'sucked badly', rephrased from my convo with her.
jodie said her first day at nj was 'better than she expected', though she pretty much wanted to go back to rj.
2 of my classmates are fortunate enough to get back to ac through appeals.
um.. me?

my mom and dad are concerned about my school, but their persistent curiosity is driving me nuts. inSAINT. IN SAINT. IN SAINT!!!!

ARGH SAINTS. IM A SAINT NOW. IM SO TIRED AND I FELL ASLEEP IN FRONT OF MY omg omg omg omg x x x x x x OGL is driving my nuts why must i get this everytime.

sorry im going to break out into another complaining fit.
whyyyyyyy. when i heard that joy was going back to ac due to BAND. i just felt like melting onto the bus floor, because today is the results for cca appeals and NO ONE CALLED ME. i already calculated, the percentage of me getting back to ac as the day passes, is actually 1.6%. which means a miracle will only see me through my desires. i wanted to cry so badly. shocking, but true. i guess im either overly dependent on comfort zones, or i really love ac.

what im really afraid of is the fact that i have to make friends all over again. the last time this happened was in sec1. when i got posted into scgs from rgp. i missed my clique like crazy, while they adapted well into the rg environment because everyone just mass migrated there whilst only 5 people went to sc. it was a horrible year. so horrible its memorable. (kacha!) im really traumatised.

WENTING. says:
lol. k see, ac is the neutral guy, but you like him. then sa is the other guy who wants you to liek him but you're too obsessed over the neutral guy to pay him any attention. and by the time you start paying attention to the guy who likes you, it's all over ):

so, if im really going to stay in sa. i better start liking sa now. seek out his hidden, probably (barely existent) charm, and fall in love with sa.

UP AND ON! UP AND ON!

2007-03-06T07:36:00.000-08:00

just as you thought i was done with the latest post, here is another one.

i am forcing myself on sappy korean songs in a bid to push myself into depression.
um. not working. i am as cool as a cucumber.

friends, esp jasmin wong, i haven't had the chance to tell you about my secret eye candies in ac. i shalllllllllllllllllllll not. reveal them today. maybe through email? one fine day, you shall find wonderful surprises in your inbox.

crashed rj after my appeal to ac today. it was fun. fun, thats about the only word i can only think of. met wenting, jodie and lois. YESH! and ate food there, people watched, crashed tutorials, lied to people who asked about my school (yes i hail from millenia institute)

But the meetup with wenting was worth the $8 cab ride from dover close.

2007-03-06T07:32:00.000-08:00

rah friends. zee weadar iz fine esh ze sun! horrible mimicking of a sentence punctuated with frenchy wrenchy accent.

guess what.
(what)

i got into..... (c: (c: (c; |c: |c: )c: )c: (note the transformation)
SAJC ARTS STREAM.

ah! perfection! i've done it again! (breaks into a self embrace)

i am currently rubbing my chin to find the right words to type.

enough about the nonsensical shitz. let's move on and talk about how i treasured the last moments i had in ac. Typed in proper english. Let's Go!

I opened my mouth and sang the school anthem for the last time with pride (ok this sounds . patriotic.) before reaffirming my loyalty to Singapore, our sunny island. I decided to buck up and listen to all my tutorials. Everything went according to plan, until Economics broke my perfect plan. CLIFTON KOH. (does the anime eyes burning with rage thingo) Um. I enjoyed mass pe. Finally did swimming. AND. When school finally ended, i bummed around and watched the OGAs cheer at the bleachers. The ac spirit just seeped through me at that point of time. While waiting for Weiting to finish trumpet practice, i was glancing at the sports complex, the people running on the track and all that. I love this vibrant atmosphere, and I have grown to love it. I can't stand typing in proper english.

It's been only 22 hours and i already miss my class. 1ad2! big sigh. I'm going to miss ac hell loads.

i wanted to paste a beautiful photo of the ac badge here, in remembrance of the great times i've had in ac. BUT. BLOGGER REFUSED TO COMPLY WITH MY REQUEST SO I WILL STORM OFF TO THE BATHROOM AND WASH AWAY MY ANGER. goodnight.

2007-03-05T09:30:00.000-08:00

quik posx quik posx!

me, in a horribly scared/anxious/excited/EXCITED mood now.

in the next 10 hours, i will be going to ac to make a general appeal, after dialing 6-6-9-1-2-1-3-1 for the jae posting results. things are sort of screwed since i lack a band testimonial and worse, the ac band teacher rejected my appeal right in my elitist face. alright minus elitist. seriously, i am going to MISS my friends in ac. in bimbo quantitative speak, im going to miss them truckloads. especially my not so crazy but still lovable class! with my horrible student reviews by my dear subject teachers, going to ac will be a miracle. i still hold on to a little hope and pray that something miraculous will happen!

in the following 2 hours after the appeal, i will hopefully zoom and scoot off to rj with jessica where i will jump for joy at the sight of wenting, lois and jodie, where we can hopefully spend at least an hour catching up on what else. school gossip and great horror tales of the great rj. seeing myself actually wearing the rj pe shirt (GOSH MY DREAM REALISED) no seriously, i was just joking. um um um.

the 3 hours after that shall be spent going to the airport to fetch eunice ng if all goes well and . no unfortunate unforeseen disruptions occur.

that shall be the end, before i tumble onto bed and wake up to a whole new beginning at a different school. will it be sa or cj? ...or ac?

pray hard, submit your fate to God, girl.

2007-02-22T08:16:00.000-08:00

since its another 6 more hours till wake up time, i shall do a jiggly giggly quix posx.

last week had been a blast. i really loved last week. with all the festivities and whats not. FUN!

this week! cny was rather alright. i met my su po who is turning 80 next year. my su po is my grand uncle's wife. or is it my great grand uncle's wife. she's a toothless sweet ol lady whose picture i shall post another time. slept over at wanyins house during the cny hols and had fun watching (tv). wednesday, we were back in school and it was a total killer. after days of pigging out we had mass pe. gosh how my tummy aches from all the crunches. i kept trying to psyche myself into falling ill during pe.

i need more sleep.

2007-02-20T09:45:00.000-08:00

the air smells burnt. roaaaastin' ! (geeez)

2007-02-11T07:52:00.000-08:00

I'm perturbed. By stuff that is of no concern to me. By stuff I choose to make a big hooha of. To the friends who virtually do not read this blog, I am bogged down by society. Oh what a glorious topic to get involved in! You just think too much girl.

Goodnight World. Dang I sound emo! HAHA.

2007-02-08T07:38:00.001-08:00

Helloooo i haven't exactly been blogging much. i hope people still actually pop by and update themselves about my life.

Anyway school has been great so far. I look forward to going to school! Meeting my retarded classmates makes my day. I seriously love my class. Lets recap and see what my classmates/ other school friends have done to have all of us grinning like Cheshire cats by the end of the day. (by no order of merit, here goes)

1) running together with my canoe team-mates gets me happy. Even though its not exactly enjoyable and I'm always the last to finish my laps. Saying 'Let's Go Girls!' together glues the team together.
2) seeing the Econs teacher getting exasperated and quarrelling with the guys just cracks me up.
3) Julien gay-ing around with the sc pe shirt sticking on his fat body. he acting cool is so not cool. Seeing suyin slap him.
4) the class bitching and bitching and bitching... Surprisingly we find it interesting to bitch about the same people everyday. Always a great conversation starter.
5)Feeling dumb after periods of chemistry where the teacher lives for bringing people down by questioning their intellectual capabilities and pre j1 lifestyle. Still. Suck in the insults and fart it out.
6) Feeling a little bitchy.
7) Laming around again during math lessons. Doing math tutorials.
8) talking with ¼ of the class after cross country and laughing at pick up lines, munching on yummy Indian food at sixth ave. (c:
It's not that this list doesn't sound interesting, it's just that I can't think of anything much currently.Will update more after o level results come out tomorrow.

A new ice cream parlour opened at bukit timah. I ate honey lavender ice cream. Sinful.

2007-01-29T08:40:00.000-08:00

Well well. It's been days since I ever last blogged. Still struggling with the culture shock, though compared to sec1, I seem to be able to adapt with less difficulty.

Just to update you guys, im in canoeing. And im barely alive, still alive yes thank you and losing fats from all the crazy jogging/ running which I absolutely hate. Just today there was another canoeing session where we were shown videos on rowing styles, which included elements of physics. HOW CAN THIS BE?! Luckily I took physics. Therefore the boat did not capsize due to the stable cg of the rower. Ok whatever. NEXT.

The canoeing people are nice. This, by which I mean the girls! Being emotional species, we have sort of bonded after 5 sessions of rigorous training, a few hundred push ups and crunches and many many kilometers of jogging. Plus, exercising sort of gets me on a temporary high, which is like, woah! Alright, NEXT.

The weather's been really chilly nowadays. Grey, cloudy nights, with the wind blowing straight in my face. I'm totally frozen right down to my butt. And I cut my hair! (Which has no relation whatsoever to the weather.) It's like rather short now. According to the auntie may who was in charge of snipping my hair, I have the ‘career woman’ look. Thus, I need a hairstyle that tells people 'I'm in charge'. Please do not brush off this; I'm stating the absolute facts.

As for my class, they are this crazy bunch who detest Chinese, can't wait to skip Chinese, love to drive the dear econs teacher Sir Clifton Koh crazy. (The best part is when his nostrils flare). Uh apart from all the lame crap and sexual humour they indulge in (like saying nis-py a lot of times), I can't really talk to them. I suppose I need time to warm up to my class. Seriously, they are a really really sweet bunch.

Anyway I think I'm embarking on another Valentine's Day project!!!!!!!!

2007-01-19T10:36:00.000-08:00

Certain things that seem to make life worthwhile.

The stars tonight are absolute causes for joy; I can actually see the Orion belt! For the first time in the year I actually see so many stars up in the sky. Plus, the midnight air was topped with a hint of sweetness. Lovely! Unfortunately the playground was under repair, if not I would have grabbed the opportunity to lie down on my favourite cute old yellow slide and gaze at the teddy velvety bluish sky.

I saw a guy giving out free hugs at orchard today, and I went for it, and got a hug that was probably long overdue. (c: Otherwise, today was a bored, stoned day where I went out to town with the og but just wasn't in the mood to talk much. On a lighter note, I'm beginning to think that my class will be quite fun after all. I keep having mixed feelings about acj. Fickle.

I've discovered my love for liqueur. Whisky and Brandy! Just the day before, I was late for school and got into detention (the guy let me off because I'm just an innocent j1.) Fortunately, the CHRISTMAS PUDDING ice cream I discovered at The Daily Scoop just made my day. Mixed with CINNAMON, wee droplets of RUM, chopped bits of Christmas pudding (save the sponge layers), it is pure bliss! So true. I'm looking forward to future possibilities of gastronomic therapy. If there's such a term.

Reminder: I have to stop being such a bitch and start being thankful for the good things in life.

2007-01-15T08:44:00.000-08:00

being able to self love, and love God more and more and more. thats all i want to do now. i pray that school wont distract me from my main purpose.

2007-01-12T23:12:00.000-08:00

for the sake of friends who want updates on my life, ill talk about the various stuff im facing with in ac.

ac's like great, in the sense that i get to soak in this methodist atmosphere. there was worship in the morning on wednesday, and being able to praise the Lord with a bunch of schoolmates on a normal wednesday was great.

ok i have to rush off to church soon so i shall type afap! yesterday was another shiok day (c: we had movie under the stars and the ac council was screening 'click' in the LT. surprisingly, i was SO TOUCHED by the storyline that tears kept streaming down my face and i couldn't stop wiping away my tears. even the guy behind me was like sniffing away. so. YOU should try click. (lois if you're reading you SHOULD WATCH THIS AND CRY AWAY!) after that the og went out to swensens for supper and well. it was alright. but i still had fun!

im still thinking whether choosing canoe was the right choice. one, i have to sacrifice my weekends and i cant meet up with my dear friends. its just so antisocial. two, the training is going to be killer and i hope i can pull through torture. maybe ill just do this for another half a month till jae's out. i do hope that i made the right choices for my subject combis toooooooo.

so there!

2007-01-11T07:41:00.000-08:00

i seriously bet im the only one in the og who actually blogs about my day.

anyway, today was yet another eventful day. lois and i went to send jasmin off at her house. as i was walking back to the busstop to head for school at an unearthly 6am, i passed by sc and i was flooded with memories of me walking to school in the morning, looking at the sky and infamous jams of bukit timah. the setting at 6am seems surreal, and i bet i cant find this anywhere except at sc, the junction between rtc and scgs.

headed for ac, where i passed off as the rare breed of rg girls whose existing population stands at one (plus one aka me) currently. as usual, i stoned and skipped talks. and im proud to announce that i currently stand at 170.5cm! ive gained 0.5 cm and 2kg! og played a little badminton then headed for harbourfront mall where we pigged out and ate close to 80 dishes of sushi.

it was a close fight to being bulimic, as me and yeewen felt super ill after 40 odd dishes of sushi. to add fuel to the fire, the who can speak better indian accented english quarrel between royston and zongxian DID NOT HELP. following which, we dragged our heavy and wet bodies in the heavy rain to anna's house where we chilled and played poker cards. slapjack is fun. and i learnt to play the intro of qing tian! WHEE :cD heck, though this sounds pretty much gay. WHEE!

2007-01-10T08:24:00.000-08:00

well ac's a bore. spent the last three days wandering and stoning in the jap cafe and the void deck with my og. skipped practically every lecture. in short. yawn.

since i had so much time on my hands, i decided to bring to ac my hole ridden shorts to sew while plugging into a very handy ipod. it provided me a great chance to mend the six month old hole in my shorts.

on the other hand my og's great. for the first time in the week i have spent in ac, i almost laughed till i cried. after a boring day of school, anna, yeewen, bryan, royston, shixian and i went to settlers cafe to waste away our remaining time by playing board/card games. 'bang' was the best alright. the aim of the game is supposed to eliminate the sheriff before you get killed, using various weapons to attack. our first innocent casualty was yeewen and she died a horrid death by being bombed twice while serving time in prison. in the second round, shixian threw out a dynamite followed by a punch and another 'bang' and all sorts of crap to protect himself and ended up revealing all his cards. (you can only throw out one attack at a time.) played taboo later and needless to say, it was hilarious.

indeed, things are looking up after all. while jasmin is on the plane off to uk, lois will be laughing at gross stuff in rj, and i'll be in ac, playing all sorts of sports and hopefully laughing my head off with my og.

jasmin, all the best! fighting! ajja!

2007-01-07T06:46:00.000-08:00

wow ive been on the com for a long time!

im currently being really childish.
and i secretly hope that school will turn out to be a blast tomorrow.
because my current state of mind is hindering my efforts to have a great time.

-
campfire was the last day of orientation, and we literally danced the night away. gnomes are a bunch of people hooked on dancing, and we were one of the last to leave. great fun man.
i shant bother to type anymore. ive been telling everyone about this.

and ive got a sunburn and a peeling nose plus mud filled nails that has touched earthworms.
eew.

2007-01-05T09:46:00.000-08:00

id rather pour out my feelings in here than drown people in my endless blabberings. that's because i tend to get random and this often ends up disrupting my train of thought.

in short, im feeling threatened by the new environment.

-
alright i shall dive into further details about the much anticipated acjc orientation. ac loves doing cheers, and the ogls always expect the j1s to huddle around each other and stamp their feet on the floor so the floor can 'RUMBLLLE'.

'AC, ARE YOU READY TO RRRRUUMBLLE?!'
(floor vibrates slightly)

there and that. a string of cheers erupt from the bleachers, and the 4 clans are expected to scream their lungs out and earn woahs from the overall in charge.
that's the ac spirit, so far.

one incident on the second day sort of caught me by surprise. there was this old chap who was running his final lap at the track, sprinting with all his might. from the bleachers erupted cheers for the old chap as he crossed the finishing line. i bet he faked the nonchalent expression when he walked away from the finishing line.

another story for another time.
toodles!

2007-01-04T06:42:00.000-08:00

ive just fallen prey to the sc blues.
looking at the colour of my school uniform, this is a rather apt statement.
OH WOE! someone misses SCGS.

till then.
mass dance is fun!

rock you, shock you, bring you down to your knees.
and you wail.

-

i realised why im always so unhappy with my situation. i just dont understand how blessed i am.
keep the memories, and move on with life. going to ac may just turn out to be the bestest decision of my life. im just going to keep moving on in my walk with God.

friends, i will miss you. but the end is not in sight.
WHEN I GET A TAGBOARD. I EXPECT TO SEE FLOODS OK.

2006-11-26T07:12:00.000-08:00

what have i realised today?

i see someone with an added perspective. previously i thought she was just some pretty face who had her dad's money to start her own fashion line, and some online music portal, but looking at what she said in the newspapers today, i realised i had been wrong all along. she said that life is 10 percent what happens to us, but 90 percent how we react to it. very very very true, because i have just realised this very truth merely an hour ago.

disappointments are aplenty, but hope never dies. i have always always hated disappointments, especially those that come straight from friends and family. friends make up 90 percent though, and i let myself sink into frustration over it. luckily ive learnt to cope with that, and that simply is to let out my emotions instead of waiting for them to pile up and just sink further into a bottomless pit self created.

hope. hope always keeps my spirits up, in spite of any depressing situation. hope allows me to forget, and possibly forgive. i believe that hope never vanishes, it just disappears for awhile.

ah. im rambling again. BUT, i hope that the next few weeks will not simply be leisure and all fun, but possibly inspiring, memorable, and life changing perhaps. I CANT WAIT!

korean songs are great! one wonders why korean dramas turned out the other way round.

2006-11-24T22:51:00.000-08:00

i feel very lost now.

but anyway, i wanted to say that i truly believe in 'Lost and Found'.
from the intangible stuff ie: feelings blah aspect, i have lost, but found, much more.
truly thankful for my friends.
truly thankful for life,
truly thankful for my sister, my cute sister, my unusually weird mom, and my sweet dad.
to put my gratitude down in black and white is a difficult, impossible task.
heck material stuff and shopping.
hurrah!

prom was a boring affair, but the time spent with friends were priceless.
the rain twisted all our plans, but.
hanging out with lois and wanyin, our threesome was cool beyond words.
simple things like eating icecream, (HONEY VANILLA!)
taking buses to nowhere,
playing (yawn) boring monopoly,
watching youtube together,
hugging them whole-heartedly,
talking about how some peoples faces are so shapely, so angular,
walking in the rain hunting for apartments
suffering continuous pelts from rain
being drenched together.

much much more.
JASMIN WONG WHERE IN THE WORLD ARE YOU?

its amazing what a change in weather can do to your life.

2006-11-19T06:50:00.000-08:00

OK I CANNOT BE SO FICKLE AND IRRITATING AND BUGGING PEOPLE FOR THEIR OPINIONS. pleaseeeeeeeeee be opinionated michelle lai jingmin.

seriously, i get fed up myself when i ask people what they think.
thats really odd.
get a life!

2006-11-17T20:24:00.000-08:00

alright quick post.

intially i planned to sit down and type whilst sipping water. sounds like some scriptwriter in the making eh! eh heh heh heh!

ALRIGHT i cant be bothered to blog anymore. i will bathe and ZOOM off for a hair cut.

ever as quick like lightning,
ciao.
(zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzoom)

2006-10-19T08:49:00.000-07:00

yay today was graduation day, and yes i must say, i feel that my emotional knots are coming undone, which gives me a great feeling!
of all the teachers in sc, i'll miss mrs logan! :cO horrors of horrors!

alright shall paste some pictures here, pure eye candy for your viewing pleasure! it's meant to relax your eyes, to give it a break from that torrid horrid world that loves to drown us in stress. the friendships we make in sc, im glad for that!

i have decided that i like brandied cherries. i love brandy (and cherries)!

mee pok man, cute old toothless guy. (c:

me jodie and wanyin (i have many other gross pictures of wanyin making faces)

jiaxin (c:

jess (i look gross here!!)

jasmin, me and lois (c:

4pr, the graduating class of 2006

2006-10-16T20:25:00.000-07:00

there are a few issues i've been wanting to mention, been strugging with it for awhile.
so i thought, might as well say all of it and hope it comes to a closure before i prepare myself mentally for a bout of late night studyings.

.. here i go.

sc is going to undergo a period of great change, where the signature pillars will be gone, its foundation will be shaken, its culture will be threatened. who knows what God intends to do for sc? im worried for sc, im curious about whats going to happen, im anxious. i happen to be part of the last batch that leaves before sc undergoes such a huge change. lucky or not, i do not know. but i am fortunate to have received 4 years of such wonderful teachings that have shaped me into a better, though not perfect person. OK THIS IS SO NOT ME, but i will remember the teachings of sincerity, courage, generousity and service. i will carry about me the air of what a cultured sc girl will be, to tell the world how proud i am of sc. though i really really disliked the earlier years of my secondary education, i am thankful for ms heng, and the friends i could have never made if this school hadnt existed. closure.

ah, the band. what will happen to it while sc is morphing into something better? this will be a trying time for the band. i suppose the band will either emerge united and unscath, or simply crumble and wait for time to pass and hope a some chap will pick up the remains and glue it back to a perfect whole. the alumni will be tested as well, its a test on their loyalty for an experience that has been an important part of their lives. i hope i will be loyal enough to help out as they move towards an impending syf. KELLY WU, your seniors will come back to help you , you hear me? (c: closure.

my future seems to be clouded with worries, unknowns, fleeting feelings of joy, sadness, anger, realisation. this is totally not the outlook i should be carrying with me as i proceed on conquering trecherous paths ahead. i worry about the choices i will be left with when i receive my disgusting o level results, i worry about the choice i will choose as a result of my limited choices. actions are better than words, study! closure.

my exams are two weeks away and i am not mentally prepared, still wading in the goong fantasy, (yes, goong). one helpful method would be to psyche myself with the mantra that FANTASIES DO NOT MIX WITH REALITY and to prevent myself from uploading goong song lyrics on ipod so i do not harbour any oh so happy and gay thoughts on life. here i warn all readers, do not frown upon me or shake that head in disgust! i am not going to drown, i am conserving my energy to freestyle across the fantasy to shore. oh wonderful paradise, here i come! years later i will look back on these silly thoughts and laugh at myself. yes. CLOSURE.

after typing all these dense thoughts and piling them up here, i am a freeer person! closure closure closure. one last closure, i love music, like the beatles said, nothings gonna change my world, that will never change!

no matter how tough the next two weeks are going to be, i am going to hand all my troubles to God and hope everything will run smoothly. i have no choice, and limited time. it is going to be another test. TIME TO STUDY!

GOOD LUCK FRIENDS! you're going to be alone for these two weeks, so you need luck! my luck! i'll keep you guys close to my heart though we wont be seeing each other!

closure!

2006-10-08T03:15:00.000-07:00

im always so susceptible to reading passages where people proclaim their love for their friends, and family, exclaim how much they love everyone.. you get the drift.
it's these kind of stuff that get me down, makes me feel all horrid about myself because i cant seem to compare to those people in terms of 'how much i love my friends or family', or how 'perfect' we all are. WELL, i know its pure induced self pity. Thats why im going to turn a blind eye to whatever i see to avoid any symptoms that bear a slight resemblance to those of self pity. NO MORE SELF PITY! oh how much i hate self pity.

i forgot what i was supposed to type about.

nevermind. i'll recall it later.

2006-10-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

october 3, we sprang an early birthday surprise on lois!
a tiring day in school - learnt that i actually had so much to work on during the upcoming three weeks.
counted down to 1.40pm, which signalled the start of preparation for lois's surprise!
kickstarted the whole thing by heading to serene centre for icecream and macs, bought our lovely ice cream cake.
fast forward......... and jasmin, wanyin, shun and i cabbed to lois's house to carry out our plan.

found a spot to lay out the candles so that it was shaped like a heart, but the agony! the wind blew out the candles just when lois was led to the ehem, 'surprise'. what a spoiler. sang the birthday song, cut and ate the cake, played badminton and childish kiddy computer games like RED BEARD and SAVING THE SHERIFF (i think that's how you spell this). the last part was plain fun. spent the remaining 60 minutes laughing our heads off, screaming, clapping, hitting the wall in disbelief. red beard kept drowning, and we kept falling off the steps! plus, our roller coaster kept straying off the rails in WILLY WONKA'S GREAT COASTER RIDE. (i made up the title myself, subjected to inaccuracy.) it's been a long time since i shrieked that much.

happy birthday lois choa shu fen, you've been a great great great great out of the world, out of this world friend.

thanks for the hilarious times we had today! :cD
i think God actually answered my prayers. i really think so.

2006-09-26T07:56:00.000-07:00

yawn.

i sort of figured that my attachment to sc is a one of a love-hate, love to hate, hate to love sort of relationship. who wouldn't like this sort of life man, well I WOULDN'T. come to think of it, its barely one month's time before im really leaving. (four years!) i hate to think of the thought of entering some really foreign jc with guys prancing all over the place. eeeuuugh. then again, who would? but i know i'll miss sc's toilets. definitely.

went to the canteen this morning, and saw that it's really a whole different mood compared to what you get during recess. it's totally refreshing and serene, and the tables are clean. i came to a conclusion that i would treasure the last four weeks or so i have here and study hard! which i am not doing now.

wellllll. i suppose studying my guts out will help me appreciate sc more.
note: i really have to buck up on amath. esp relative velocity. (GAWR) just a random word. please please pray for me, that i'll understand what amath is all about before the big o's!

i miss glancing at the singtel tower atop those canopy of trees. it's far far away. and that feeling's just coming back. im a sensual person. (this sounds really random but heck! i know what im talking about and thats all i need to know)

GOODBYE.